Recently, while watching a speaker on Zoom, I found myself. . . .wandering. He wasn't boring, exactly -- he had plenty of enthusiasm, was energized about his message, used lots of gestures, threw in a few topical stories. All characteristics of an engaging speaker. So why wasn't I engaged? I wasn't tired, or hungry, or particularly preoccupied with a problem at hand.
After he finished, I reflected on what he had said. I had the gist of the main thought, but try as I might, I could not remember his supporting points. Were there three? Five? I recalled snapshots, bits of story and thought strung together, but not in any order that I could follow. And so I couldn't remember how he reached his conclusion. Which made me doubt that conclusion. Not to say I doubted his credibility - because he is an expert, well respected in his field. But as far as this particular message was concerned, I was not "sold."
I offer this a reminder that -- especially in these days of Zoom fatigue -- we need to give our listeners a clear roadmap if we expect them to follow us. That's the best way they can reach our conclusion with us. Many people shy away from the old "here's what I am going to tell you; here I am telling you (points 1, 2, 3); now I have told you" formula because they think it dry and unimaginative. But your audience is not filled with mind readers. So if you're going to eschew this way of mapping your speech out for them, you need to double down on other auditory signposts: "first," ''second," 'that brings us back to," etc.
It's your job to keep them following you on the trail of your story. Don't take detours or meander, no matter how pleasant that scenic overlook just off the path may be. Unless you want to lose your audience along the way!
Spring has sprung!
I just returned for a walk around my Brooklyn neighborhood and it was entirely rejuvenating! The sun was out, coffeeshops that had closed have reopened, previously vacant storefronts were bustling. NYC slogged through a long, hard winter, but now it's bursting with new life!
There are still some vestiges of the dark days of the past year, though: signs in windows and trees festooned with messages of thanks to our first responders. I hope we never forget how they helped us through those first months. I said my own prayer of thanks for them and their steadfastness in the face of so much horror.
But, as often happens on a walk, my mind free-associated, and I thought of a conversation I had recently with a client about his business communication style. He knew that being reactive is not a good way to manage, so he was trying to be more proactive in all his speaking and writing. But that still wasn't working for him. I read some sample correspondence, and steered him toward a better approach.
Take the idea of active away altogether, I said. Don't be re- or pro-. To clarify or convey information, or answer questions, the best approach is to be responsive. (This is where my mind went after thinking of first responders, you see.) Before you show your vast array of knowledge, before you "take charge" of the conversation, you need to make sure you are responding to what you're being asked, what the situation is, who's asking, what they already know, etc.
Because it doesn't matter if it's your direct report, your boss, or your client. They can't read your mind. So you need to say the parts you instinctively rush over in your eagerness to give the right answer.
Connect the dots. Let them in on your thought process. They'll follow your logic and understand your answer better. You may even cut down on the confusion that leads to that endless loop of follow-up question-clarification-further question-and-so forth-and-so on. . . .
That'll give you more time to go enjoy the beginning of a beautiful season!
Avoid that messy clean-up
January was full of events, some of them quite messy. It took a lot of work just to get through the month! But we're here, in February. And we've turned a page. We can even see a glimmer of the light at the end of the tunnel.
But we've got this month and a few more to get through before we fully exit that tunnel. At our house, we're spending that time finally watching all of Schitt's Creek. Just in time for their Golden Globe nominations! The show provides a terrific bit of escapism. The writing is sharp, the directing is clever, and the acting is amazing. As a fan of Catherine O'Hara and Eugene Levy from their early days playing with other brilliant comedians on SCTV, it is a treat to see their talents so gloriously displayed.
It's comfort viewing, so I usually just give myself over to the world of Schitt's Creek. But last night (in Season 6), my communications coaching reality intruded. I don't think I'm giving anything away to disclose that by Season 6 Moira Rose finds herself in the spotlight once again. She is doing a remote interview from her room at the Rosebud Motel, while her daughter Alexis (now her publicist) desperately tries to keep Moira on message with giant cue cards. Moira's an actor, so you would think she'd know how important it is to stick to the script. But Moira has a very healthy ego. So she "riffs" a bit, expanding upon the agreed-upon text. It is very funny, and perfectly in character.
But you're not Moira Rose. So don't do this. It's tempting, when you have an audience hanging on your every word, to extemporize and go off on whatever tangents you fancy. And it's not just interviews. I advise clients to avoid this trap in every meeting by having talking points and staying on message. Sticking to the script isn't being "canned" or "stiff." It's being prepared. Sure, it takes a bit of time to think about what you want to say before you say it. But spending that time to prepare will help you help yourself. Think of all the time you'll save after the fact, when you don't have do a "clean-up in aisle five." Or anywhere else!
No need to wrap
I'm taking a minute away wrapping, shipping, baking, decorating, and generally catching up on my seasonal errands to wish you all a festive Holiday Season! I know this is for most of us the weirdest December in memory, but we're going to get through it. And then, as a recognition of our patience and resilience, we win the prize: A New Year! Goodbye to 2020 and all its tragedy and disappointment.
In the spirit of the season, I'm giving a gift to you, my faithful readers. As you know I was Zooming before Zoom was cool, and have been coaching speakers and offering webinars on communicating with professionalism and presence over Zoom. And I'd like to give you this One Foolproof Tip for making sure your message is heard, even by audiences tempted by WFH distractions. Here it is: Look at the camera!
I know I've said this before, but this is the single biggest thing you can do to grab your listener's attention. It's not necessarily easy to retrain yourself to look at the camera rather than people's faces when you talk to them. But think about it: when you look at them to see their reaction, they aren't really seeing you if they can't see your eyes. You are putting yourself, your needs (to "read" them---which is even more impossible than usual on a virtual platform!), above their need to see you! So when you're in a meeting and feel the urge to look at your colleagues when you make your point, remember: you have a 100% better chance of connecting with them if you stifle that urge and focus on the camera.
Zoom meetings and presentations won't be going away anytime soon. Those who have mastered this medium are already reaping rewards. I could point you to articles and research that reinforce this, but you already know it's true. My gift, then, is really more of a challenge: Just do It!
And have as Merry-as-Possible a Holiday!
Giving thanks
In case you've had difficulty keeping track of the passage of time this year, you're not alone. So let me remind you: The Holiday Season is upon us! This year it will be ... different. Traditional gatherings will take place virtually. Carols will be silenced, or sung as shower solos. The hubbub of activity will slow to a trickle. And yet, like many of you, I feel there are still things to be thankful for. Here's my shortlist:
Vaccines that are on their way.
The health of friends and family. And the actions of all those here in NYC and elsewhere who have valiantly fought the spread, like the brave Germans in this PSA.
Zoom Theatre with Pipeline Playwrights. We've learned how to use this new platform to share our creative work online. We've been able to stay in touch with our long-time supporters and connect with new, faraway fans.
Rockefeller the owl. This little guy emerged unscathed from the disappointingly droopy spruce at Rockefeller Center. He's a perfect reminder that surprises happen when you least expect them.
Clients who embrace the New Normal. I tip my hat to those who've pivoted to virtual annual meetings, interviews, and more, using Zoom, Teams, or Meet as tools for meaningful communication. They've jumped in with both feet and aren't waiting till we can get back to "the way it was before."
And I am very thankful for you, faithful reader, for keeping in touch by sharing your success stories (and sending me new clients). Wishing you a happy--if quiet--Thanksgiving, a time for reflection, rest, and rejuvenation.
Getting out and turning out
I love fall! The crispness in the air, the crunch of leaves underfoot, the opening of the theatre season! This year I've had to modify my expectations. Instead of doing a family Broadway evening, we saw the sights of Manhattan by night on a cruise with Classic Harbor Line. It was relaxing, enlightening, and a bit thrilling to be doing something so out of our daily routine. When we can back out in the world, I am sure many of us will value the events we attend and excursions we take more highly.
One excursion I hope we will all take (if we haven't already) is the short trip to the voting booth. Or the postbox, drop box, or local election office. There are many variations this year for getting your ballot to where it needs to go. It can be confusing! Fortunately, FiveThirtyEight.com has aggregated all the latest info here.
Voting is one of the most important things we can do as citizens, but our highest turnout for presidential elections in the past fifty years was just over 58%, in 2008. So we all need to pitch in and help family and community members make a plan to vote and act on it. If you need more info, check out TAG10WomenVote .
I wrote my play It's My Party! about the passage of the19th Amendment, largely because that story is so unknown. Every time it's performed or read, audience and cast alike tell me that they learned so much about American women's decades-long struggle to win the vote. On one hand I find it irritating-bordering-on-infuriating that this is all news to them! But I have seen enough U.S. History textbooks to know how cursorily the subject is covered - if at all!
Since I have always believed that hearts and minds can be opened through experiencing art more effectively than through other ways of learning, it was with great delight that I read this in the Columbus and Starkville, Mississippi Dispatch last week:
"[Robyn] Medeiros . . . said being a cast member of It's My Party! motivated her to register to vote in this year's election. 'When I turned 18, I was so overwhelmed by the transition to college life that I didn't want to add another thing to my plate. I was feeling similarly this year. But after learning about what Alice [Paul] and Lucy [Burns] went through to achieve this right, I couldn't pass it up. There's definitely a power to it, to have a say in how government should be run.' "
So run, walk, bike, drive, hop; get your ballot in the ballot box however you can. To make sure your vote is counted. Because short-distance trips are sometimes the most rewarding.
Bringing in the harvest
The scene at the farmer's market this past Saturday was one of abundance: so much late summer produce available. Perfectly, mouth-wateringly ripe. We've already begun certain food rituals of the season here at my house: making our first ratatouille; grilling eggplant for delicious smoky eggplant spread; freezing the first few batches of pesto from my garden. Good thing I wasn't planning on canning anything this year!
The market is laid out differently now, with more space in between stalls, and there are lines at all the entry points. But the only indication from a produce perspective that this is a fall unlike any other is the dearth of jack-o-lantern pumpkins. One farmer said they weren't bringing them to the City because they doubted there would be much demand for them, since so many seasonal gatherings have been cancelled. But our Governor, who has been pretty strict with all things COVID, said he would not ban trick-or-treating. So maybe we'll see those carving pumpkins there next week.
And even in this unusual fall, I still feel -- when the chill is in the air and the apples are especially crisp --- the urge to think about what I'm harvesting from spring-planted seeds.
I am harvesting creativity: I started writing my newest play, Saltwater Farm, in January, but the bulk of the writing came between April and August. My need to escape pandemic daily reality combined with extra found time, and that combination allowed me to create a world in another time and another place. My talented cast read the play in two parts. If you missed them, you can check them out on YouTube here (Act One) and here (Act Two).
I am harvesting consulting opportunities. As many annual conferences and meetings are being reimagined online, I am training speakers to deliver engaging messages and connect more with virtual audiences. I enjoy it, and always have time to help more people. Email me if you'd like to talk about how I can work with you or your organization.
I am harvesting hope. This pandemic won't last forever, but it will be a slog to get even close to the lives we led Before. Every step of that journey will be worth it if we take that time to begin dismantling the inequities this period has so starkly revealed. In this blog back in June, I mentioned some non-fiction works that helped give me perspective on these issues. Here are two novels that have given me further illumination (and enjoyment!) during this time: the '90's novel Daughters by Paule Marshall and the recent Booker Prize-winner Girl, Woman, Other by Bernardine Evaristo,
I am harvesting patience. I have to say, I'm not doing too well with this one. But every day offers new chances for improvement.
What are you harvesting?
Relaxing in topsy turvy time
The lakeside photo above is from an idyllic week my husband and I spent at a quiet, remote lake in Maine, just the balm we needed to salve our weary souls. After almost five months of sequestration here in NYC (the first two months in a harrowing lockdown), we needed this break. Being away from the home that has become our family workplace (as well as our gym, our restaurant, our movie theatre, our concert hall), gave me time to reflect on what we have lost and what we have gained living with this pandemic.
I won't enumerate the losses. As a speaking coach whose other line of work is live theatre, and whose favorite non-professional gig is choral singing, I have felt the loss keenly.
But what have we gained? More than I would have predicted at the outset. My production company, Pipeline Playwrights, pivoted from our usual spring reading series of new works to a Zoom series of work-in-progress excerpts. This started in April, and was well received by our regular supporters. Even better - we're now able to share our stories with friends and family who otherwise wouldn't have been able to see our work. So we're going to keep it up, and expand on this model with my upcoming reading of Saltwater Farm. For more information on how you can tune in to experience this Zoom reading of my newest play, check out the "In other news" section in my newsletter.
While I was in Maine I visited the area and the homes that provided some inspiration for that play. Here's a photo of one of my favorites.
As I wrote last month, I've also been doing Zoom webinars, coaching doctors (so far, but hope to reach out to other professions). I've been helping them learn strategies for giving effective video presentations for upcoming conferences and meetings, since they won't be traveling anytime soon. I hope to gain momentum with this specific type of coaching. If you belong to an association whose annual meeting is being moved online, I'd welcome the chance to connect with your leadership and event planners.
On days when the losses outweigh the gains, I find it useful to remember that upheaval and uncertainly have been part of the human condition for quite some time. After all, it was Heraclitus of Ephesus who said, around 500 BCE, "all things, constantly, are in flux and are, in that regard, the same."
New skills for a new world
This is me at work: in front of my handy Shoji screen (an early work-from-home purchase) flanked by my trusty fern, Vern, plugged in to my computer on a Zoom call. I meet with clients to explore how they can turn their virtual communications for meetings, conferences, interviews, etc., into dynamic, memorable interactions. Mastering the technology of your specific platform is a good idea. So is getting all your production elements right: set, lights, sound, costume.
But the most important thing to consider is how you deliver your message. And I'm not talking about turning off your video and letting your slides do the talking. You need to be every bit as present in a virtual meeting as you would be IRL--maybe even more so--to combat Zoom fatigue. Since we're not sharing and exchanging energy with the other people in the room it's easy to burn out. Even worse, when it's your turn to speak or present, you feel like you're sending your message out into a void, wondering if anyone will really hear it. This is especially true on webinars, when you don't see the audience. I've been doing a lot of these, presenting talks on being a dynamic presenter. So you can be sure I feel the pressure to be engaging every second I am on!
This is where my acting comes in handy. Here's the bottom line: in order to connect with people, not talk at them, you need to look into the camera. Every time you speak. As much as possible. You need to do you homework so you have a clear idea of who you're talking to. If you don't know the exact people you'll be addressing, use your imagination, and put a friend who has a similar professional profile or management style on the other end of that camera. If you personalize your audience this way, you'll be able to connect. To really send your knowledge, expertise, and commitment to your listeners. They'll hear what you're saying, and enjoy the meeting as well.
A victory in the daily battle against Work From Home fatigue!
A change of heart
Here in Brooklyn we've had a couple of weeks of mostly peaceful (if noisy) protests that often ended in violence erupting shortly after curfew as police confronted anyone on the streets, many trying to get home. If you think the reports of police brutality here are exaggerated, I can assure you they are not.
The scope of these protests has inspired a surge of support, and while some organizational messaging of "we must do better" is no more than performative activism, I have hope that if enough people use this moment to reflect, educate themselves and -- above all -- listen, institutional and policy changes will occur. But that will only happen when individuals have a change of heart, rise up, and say "enough!"
My hope springs from seeing evidence that change had already started. I witnessed it in late February as I Zoomed to rehearsals for It's My Party! at Bellarmine University. The student actors were grappling with the idea that white suffrage leaders in my play blatantly ignored the important role played by their black sisters. But I understood. At first I had wanted to downplay this part of the story, too, arguing it would take away from the larger arc of the crusade for women's equality. But some very wise colleagues strongly urged me to include the characters' racism in my script. And, since our country's racial division became clearer and clearer over the months I was revising, I wrote a new draft including Ida B. Wells-Barnett.
In my play Ida, a powerful voice for suffrage, confronts the leaders of the majority-white suffrage organizations. They tell her, quite reasonably (they think), that overt inclusion of black suffragists would inflame Southern Democrats, and ensure the suffrage bill's failure. Ida leaves, angrily denouncing them and their Association. She returns at the end, to bask in their shared victory, but also to deliver a warning: the fight for equality won't truly be over until all women are equal.
The actors said they were having a hard time playing characters who were lauded for accomplishing something as major as winning the vote for women, yet whose racism was so blatant. I said a few pithy things about multi-dimensional characters and the acting challenges they present. But I also asked if those historical figures were really so much more racist than people are today. My question seemed to shock them, but I understand after that particular rehearsal there were many difficult conversations between the white actors and the women of color in the cast, and in their larger college community.
That production, It's My Party!'s university premier, was cancelled due to COVID. So that message never reached a larger audience. But those in the rehearsal room began the hard work of looking at themselves, their presumptions and privileges, and doing what Ibram X. Kendi describes in his book How to be an Anti-Racist.
I hope this time of national upheaval has unlocked something in each of us, so that we can continue to grow in our understanding. I won't give you a lengthy list of resources because they seem to be everywhere, except to recommend the amazing 1619 Project, edited by Nikole Hannah-Jones, "The Case for Reparations" by Ta-nehisi Coates (which the Atlantic has made available in this PDF). and the Kendi book cited above.
And while you are reading, don't forget to breathe...
Breathing in breath-holding time
Back Before, I'd walk three to five miles a day (in good weather) between clients and meetings in Manhattan. I haven't been putting quite that much mileage on my sneakers lately, but I've been doing a circuit through my Brooklyn neighborhood. I'm almost getting used to wearing a mask whenever I leave the house. And outside it's beautiful these days: spring has sprung and I am grateful to see these signs of hope..
Others in my house have found new and creative ways to exercise their bodies and quiet their minds. Everyone I know, it seems, has a favorite online workout. There's even renewed interest in the soap treadmill craze that swept China last spring. Meanwhile, The New York Times writes that some of our new routines may annoy neighbors. People find workarounds, most notably by exercising something else--patience. Because we all understand that New Yorkers gotta move!
As we physically exert ourselves, we're reminded of the importance of breathing, of the power of the single breath. These days I feel that we're existing in a time of cosmic breath-holding. That space of waiting between inhalation and exhalation. As a singer, it echos what I feel when the conductor raises her baton for the upbeat, right before we release our song. In that moment time stands still.
But once time starts up again, once we collectively exhale, our thinking--and the way forward--will become clearer. We'll be actively engaged with the world around us. Whether it's diving back in the pool or walking miles and miles down Broadway, we'll be back and we'll be doing.
In the meantime, don't hold your breath!
What puzzles reveal
Puzzles. We've all been doing them lately, right? And not just to pass the time: puzzles are challenges that we enjoy. But they require patience, Which is probably why it's been awhile since I've spent much time poring over small, oddly-shaped pieces of cardboard spread out on a table. And re-engaging with them has reminded me of that notorious puzzle-related injury, "puzzle neck." In spite of this, they've given me hours of fun, and many insights:
Often you're looking for a piece with a recognizable attribute (say, the lowest tree branch), and you inevitably realize it has been abstracted into several jigsawed shapes. So you have to find it by less obvious means.
Sometimes you have that aha! moment when you rotate a piece upside down and it fits. Your previous perspective defined and limited your ability to see.
After working on a puzzle for an hour or two, you can magically find (in the random pile on the table) the missing piece for that part of the puzzle you're no longer obsessing over.
When we work on puzzles, our preconceptions and frames of reference are upended. A good lesson for this difficult time. We need to look for creative solutions, and be careful we don't overlook something because it doesn't look they way we think it should.
Video Tips You Can Use!
Make sure you have a background that looks work-appropriate. If you must take your video chats in your bedroom, make sure we can't see your bed! The camera defines the space we see, so find a different angle. Use Photo Booth, Camera, or a similar app to see what your camera sees--before you log on!
Dress like you're going to the actual meeting in your "business casual" attire. Comb your hair. Put on makeup, if you normally wear it. Not only will you look better on camera, you'll feel more ready to get to work.
Prepare and organize. Time flies even faster on virtual meetings and webinars. Attention spans are shorter, too. So organization is key if you want to get your message across.
I'll be offering more tips in upcoming workshops.
Be sure to visit my website to see what I'll be covering and when.
March 2020
Tranquility from an earlier time
Wash your hands. Then call me!
Life has been changing rapidly this past week. Many of you have joined me as newly-minted members of the Work From Home club. Welcome!
You've probably already found out that the upside (short commutes, savings on dry cleaning bills, wearing comfy slippers) can be outweighed by the downside.
So many adjustments, so many questions--about everything, especially communication: how do I present a professional demeanor when working from home? How can I communicate via video chat in a way that is confident, calm, and clear when the chaotic world threatens to intrude? How do I maintain focus so I can really connect?
Luckily for you, I have answers. While every situation is different--from resizing a presentation for hundreds to reshaping that high-stakes meeting--many of the same guidelines apply:
Prepare--like you never have before. Especially if your communication is of the conversational rather than presentational variety (meetings, rather than webinars).The rhythmic difference between being in the room to communicating through a device (phone, computer) means you can't "um, hmm, you know, like..." your way through things while you search for an answer.
Practice your bridge phrases--IF you do need time to think, figure out a few key phrases that work for you (DO NOT rely solely on "that's an interesting question"). Try "I am glad you brought that up,"' or "we've been working on something similar" that give you time to think. Nail them down by practicing them in the shower, or while washing your hands. For the queries that really stump you, the classic, "let me give that some thought and get back to you" never goes out of style.
Relax--but not too much! Even if you do most of your work on your couch or bed, find a table/chair combo that makes you sit up straight so you can speak with posture that conveys presence(even if you're in sweats from the waist downI).
It's a time of transition for us all. You may feel working on your onscreen/over-the-phone authentic leadership presence is just one more thing to do. But it's a fairly easy way to do some professional development (and self-improvement) that will help you rise to the top once we all get back into our offices.
So call or email me to book a session for you or your team. And I'm available if you need any speech, presentation, or talking points written, revised, or edited. If you want the reassurance of an expert to review your content, get in touch.
I'll be here. But wash your hands first!
January 2020
|
December 2019
It's that time of year
I hope this newsletter finds all my readers in the holiday spirit! I know everyone's busy this time of year, so I'll keep it short, but I wanted to share with you some tips for getting through the upcoming cycle of rush-celebrate-repeat:
If you're making a toast, don't panic: Tips for a holiday toast are here . But if looking up that link is too much, it boils down to this: Prepare. Keep it short. And remember: it's not about you!
Get the most out of every party--even neighborhood get-togethers (you never know where you'll make that next great connection). Bring your cards. Have your "cocktail party speech" ready. Don't have one? Get. one. Here's how...
And remember to pace yourself: alternate your festive cocktails/wine with water. Especially if you're toasting or speaking. Alcohol not only acts as a disinhibitor, it dehydrates you. Which dries out your throat, putting unnecessary stress on your voice during its most vulnerable season.
Whatever you do, don't forget to stop and smell the pine trees, cookies, cocoa. and all the good things that this season brings. The delicious smells of the holidays help us all breath a little more deeply.
November 2019
Autumn in New York
The days are getting shorter and there is finally a bit of a bite in the morning air. There's an energy in New York City that seems to have blown in with the seasonal chill. Everyone one has picked up their pace--not only the 50,000+ Marathoners who ran on Sunday. Walkers are briskly traversing the avenues in leather jackets and chunky sweaters. Greenmarket shoppers are scooping up the bounty of fall's harvest. The rhythm of life, never slow here, seems to have sped up a notch, as if it, too, has to move faster to stay warm.
My work this time of year thus becomes more challenging. When I work with clients, we focus on centeredness. We need to be still, in order to find and manifest authentic presence. To hold onto that, and use it whenever we speak or present, we must quiet the voice of our inner critic and maintain relaxed energy. In a conference room high above the city streets that's not so hard to do. But to hold onto that feeling when descending to those streets, walking elbow to elbow with throngs of New Yorkers and tourists--that’s the ultimate challenge!
A client recently asked me if I still got nervous when I spoke. I was honest, and said yes, especially in high stakes situations, or if I sense a challenge in the air. Then I need to lean on my technique a bit harder. Which got me thinking...maybe this year I'll apply that same concept at the start of the Season of Pre-Holiday frenzy. I'll more consciously rely on my technique, to guard against slip ups caused by a sudden surge of nerves. But that makes sense. It's kind of like doubling up on Vitamin C this time of year--or getting a flu shot!
October 2019
Recharged and Reinforced
I took some time off from coaching clients and writing plays to spend a few days with family in Maine in September. It's always good to take a break, to have a different daily rhythm, to focus on other goals. When I returned, the rest of the month flew by--weekly travel to clients in DC, guest lecturing at American University, workshop-leading, and private coaching. I love being so productive, but my comings-and-goings left no time for newsletter inspiration!
I was delighted, then, to read my own advice in the Harvard Business Review! No, I'm not quoted there, but I am sure this article by Carmine Gallo will sound quite familiar to my clients: "The best speakers make presentations look effortless precisely because they put so much effort into perfecting their delivery." Glad he backs me up on this! Practice is essential. And really great speakers know it. They just don't advertise the fact. Rehearsal is repetition, and it's not exciting or sexy, but it leads to presentations that can catapult you to even higher levels of success (see Jobs, Steve).
Gallo writes about major presentations, like TED talks or industry-wide speeches, but the truth is, you need to practice for any speech event--even (or especially) those tough one-on-ones with your boss or a difficult team member. Not the 200 times Jill Bolte Taylor rehearsed her brilliant TED talk , but enough to internalize your message so you don't get tripped up in times of stress.
Want to triumph in your next presentation or sail through any speaking situation with confidence? Listen to the experts. And practice.
August 2019
Beware the novelty act
Now that the 2020 presidential campaign is off and running I'm being asked: What do I think of Bernie's yelling?Warren's wonky performance? Doesn't Biden just look like a leader? I'm in the business of leadership communication, and I appreciate the part debates play in helping voters make up their minds. But I'm all too aware of the fact that performance is not governance. The horse race that engrosses us now is barely connected to actual policies for creating a more perfect union.
We all remember candidates who captivated us with terrific performances (who can forget Sarah Palin?) until we found out they had very little substance underneath their charisma. Which is why I fear Marianne Williamson's candidacy. We need to guard against being caught up in her performance as truth-telling outsider. I have heard many people say she made some good points, showed herself to be worthy, etc. I must admit I watched her with fascination, calculating the amount of effort she must have put into her two turns on the debate stage. The fact is, any speaker who works at it can hone a message and perfect a delivery that casts her in the role of savior. It's even easier if she adds a touch of magic and mysticism.
An ethical speaker shares insights and ideas to solve problems and create new opportunities, but the unethical speaker intentionally inflates her own importance by playing to the audience. Williamson does that when she exploits our greatest hopes and deepest fears ("if you think any of this wonkiness is going to deal with this dark psychic force of the collectivized hatred... then I'm afraid that the Democrats are going to see some very dark days.").
It's true that successful candidates connect to the hearts of voters as well as their minds. One of the best examinations of this subject is Drew Westen's 2007 book, The Political Brain. Many campaigns I have worked with use Westen's insights responsibly, to good effect. But what of those who seize upon the power of emotional connection and use it as a substitute for critical thought? Where are they leading us? We need to ask ourselves if any fresh-voiced, self-described radical renegade is being at all truthful when she promises to challenge Washington "with courageous love." If a candidate has no actual experience doing anything remotely like what she promises, how can we, as voters, believe her? We need to shake off this enchantment and demand real answers to serious questions.
I know what power there is in a performance that makes you feel. But politics isn't theatre. Or entertainment. And the stakes are too high for us to be seduced by another novel performer.
June 2019
When to call in the pros
I recently had an unexpected client: a well-regarded attorney who does a lot of speaking. He's not a person who normally needs help with any sort of speech. And yet...
He'd been chosen to be the speaker for a community celebration in a large, impressive venue.
People he'd known for years would be there, and he wanted to deliver a message that was smart, heartfelt, and with a touch of his trademark humor. It was very different from his usual type of speech!
He spent a couple of weeks kicking ideas around, trying them out on friends and family. Somewhere along the way he realized he wasn't getting the job done. So he picked up the phone and called me.
We tweaked and cut, rethought structure and word choice. He sent me rewrites. We perfected the 12-minute speech in a week! He vowed to practice more than the seven times I recommended. Afterward, he told me it was quite a success. And he even enjoyed himself!
Circumstances forced him to look beyond his usual circle. They meant well, but they didn't have the expertise. It's always good to hear a successful professional say that no matter how much experience you have, often there's something--an unfamiliar theme, unusual occasion, or lack of prep time--that makes you realize you're the one who needs help from an expert!
It's a humbling thing to admit. And can cause some consternation, maybe a bit of panic. But don't worry: I got this!
May 2019
Time disruptions
It looks like we'll just have to wait on the time-reversal technology. In the meantime, I could really use some time-stopping technology. Since I moved to New York from Virginia in August, I've spent so much time going back and forth from Brooklyn to DC that I almost meet myself coming and going. So I'd like to stop the clock and have a chance to catch up! If you can relate, you might be interested in some of the strategies that have helped me make the most of the time I have.
- Get it off your plate--when someone e-mails or calls me with a quick and easy question, I don't "put a pin in it" for later, but try to respond right away. It's done and I don't have to spend time "calendaring" it. Bonus: the person on the other end is eternally grateful!
- Block it--those small things I couldn't get off my plate quickly sit in a pile of notes that grows higher and higher till it's a towering mountain of rebuke. So I schedule a block of time (30 minutes here, an hour there) to "clean up" and deal with them. Sometimes I haven't finished the task when the time is up, but at least I have a clearer idea of how much more time is needed.
- Turn off your phone--if I need to do a deep dive into a project (editing a client speech, drafting a proposal, or writing a scene for my play) I focus ONLY on the task at hand. I get in the zone. I don't let calls, Facebook posts or (especially) tweets distract me. There is always some shiny object within reach. If I ignore it I finish faster than I thought I would! And guess what? There's an app (actually several) for that!
- Prepare, prepare, prepare--I really save time in the long run when I allot sufficient prep time for speeches, presentations, or anything that requires me to synthesize information and deliver it to others. Building on a strong foundation, I can discover my thesis, put together a deck, and compose talking points much more quickly and effectively than filling in holes on the fly.
- Reward yourself--I give myself a break when I hit certain milestones: go get a cup coffee when the first draft is done; allow myself a few minutes on social media (avoiding the sites that raise my blood pressure and take me down a rabbit hole!) after I press "send;" get up and walk around after I've made those crucial edits.
You are in very likelihood doing many of these things already. But just in case you've forgotten one or two of them, I hope this is a good reminder. And when you next put them into practice, send a good thought to me bussing it to DC and Amtraking back to NYC.
Or start working on that time machine!
