Outburst by Judit Reigl, Neue Nationalgalerie, Berlin
Speaking is not the same as talking. Sure, the basic moving parts are the same, but we engage them in different ways. In conversation, most Americans use a teensy part of their vocal ranges. If you listen to people talking to each other (some might call this eavesdropping), you’ll notice their voices mostly stay around the same three pitches, unless they are trained actors or singers. There are exceptions, or course, but studies have shown that most of us (unless under emotional pressure), stay within our narrow pitch range.
We also shy away from making declarative statements. This may have to do with the fact that we view the conversation as always evolving, as one conversation partner adds to what the other is saying. Or it may be because we fear saying anything definitive, as that might be perceived as conversation-ending. I have observed this varies according to gender, generation, and region — not only where the speaker learned to talk, but where they are now. I am sure there are studies on this, too.
There are many reasons why you talk to your friends in a series of monotone sentence fragments that never have an endpoint. But when you are a speaker, you pretty much have to do the opposite.
Work on your vocal variety to keep your audience engaged. Using more pitches in your natural voice colors your words in a way that expresses your intention. And don’t shy away from making a statement; if you wrote a period, say it! Engaging in “uptalk,” or “upspeak” (when you don’t use a downward inflection at the end of your sentence) leaves the listener wondering if you believe what you’re saying. When I point out to clients that they sound tentative unless they really end their sentences with a definite period, they assure me they 1000% mean what they say. But if I record them and play that back, well…
It can be hard to break the habit of casual “talking”. But you need to if you want to step up your professional speaking game and bring your leadership presence with you wherever you go. It’s far less cumbersome than putting lifts in your shoes or making sure your power wardrobe is back from the cleaners. Even if you lose your luggage, you’ll be recognized as a leader because you sound like one!
